Measure of Fun

This Father's Day weekend was one of those weekends where we all walked away happy.  I have to give some background before I tell my tale.  When I was growing up and even now, my Dad's side of the family was/is really close.  Not just relationship wise but also in proximity.  There's a couple families that live across the street from each other.  When I was a kid, we didn't live that close and it seemed like a lifetime away.  The families were always getting together and having fun.  Usually our family would be part of the holiday gatherings, you know Christmas, Easter, 4th of July, Thanksgiving.  I looked forward to those gatherings for many reasons.  One was the ever present laughter and game playing, and another was the greatest thing a kid can have, autonomy!  Once all the kids were together, the adults stopped paying attention.  There were a few of us older kids so the adults didn't seem to worry.  We didn't check in with the adults unless we were hungry, or someone was bleeding.  It was the best feeling in the world!  Of course, there was a hierarchy and my brother was the oldest so he seemed to be supreme ruler but we played and conspired and battled and listened to the Beach Boys for many uninterrupted hours.

So I told you all that because that experience is what I want for my boys.  I want them to play something that was their idea.  Imagining big huge worlds that have them as the creators and destroyers.  There's something about that kind of play that builds confidence and gives kids a sense of self.  These days so much of a kid's world is imagined and created for them.  The toys are already built with something in mind.  They all come as sets and each one builds on the other so there is no room for interpretation.  Of course, because of that the toys are also awesome.  I wouldn't stop them from having those toys, but what I really love is when they come together with simple toys and create an intricate world of their own.

That was this past Father's Day weekend.  My boys went to my Aunt's house (by the way, she's the mom of three of my cousins) which is an old Victorian home (I think, I don't really know my architecture) and it has this fabulous attic, great cellar like basement, two porches, and two sets of staircases.  What an great house for imagination!  My boys played with their cousins and had epic journeys throughout that house!  There were wars, aliens, ghosts, monsters, girl cooties, take no prisoners, water balloon fights, mud hole swimming, wagon rides down the hill, destruction of plants (so sorry Auntie B), and exploration of all unknown worlds.  There was sweat, there was hunger, there were tears, there was blood (several different kids) and there were ear to ear grins.  You can't get any better than that!

So as we were finally home and getting ready for bed, the Hulk, who's notorious for not being sleepy at bedtime, was so tired that we laid him into bed and he didn't move until morning.  Captain America started counting up his "wounds".  I bandaged a total of eight wounds.  Some that needed it and some that really just needed time.  I was amazed at some of the locations and asked how he got them.  His answer was to shrug and say, "We had a really good time!"  Now that is a true measure of fun.

Batman

I want to take a moment to talk about my husband (Batman).  He is a wonderful, caring, hard working man who is always doing his best for our family.  We have had many scary and crazy moments in our life together and he has always lived up to the challenge.  One of the many reasons I love him is that he believes in leading by example.  He knows that good men don't just happen.  It starts when they are boys.  Our boys see their dad as the strongest man they know.  One day they were discussing who they liked best as superheros and Hulk asked me if Daddy was as strong as a superhero.  I turned the question back on him just to see what he would say.  Hulk said, "Daddy is so strong, I bet he could pick up a train!"  That made me smile because I remember thinking that about my dad.  I remember that in thinking he was physically strong, I also thought he could handle anything that happened.  I believe that's exactly what our boys think.  Kids see the outer strength and know the inner strength is there too.

Batman, just like in the movies, is pretty good at staying cool under pressure.  There are so many moments with kids and especially with raising superheros where you are on the edge and about to lose it (or already falling).  I don't know how many times he has kept me from that edge or at least stopped me from landing on my face (or someone else).  It seems when I have come to my very last idea on helping our boys see the error of their ways, he has an idea that works!  My most favorite technique that Batman has is to wear the boys down.  I don't mean berate them into a pulp.  I mean a full fledged lecture on the importance of honesty, integrity, kindness, etc!  Guess what, my dad was really good at doing that too!  Let me tell you, I almost wished to have my hind end heated up versus the lecture and I hate pain!  I remember those lectures more than any butt whooping I received.  I remember having to repeat back to my dad what I was going to do and what I was not going to do.  I hated to disappoint my dad. I'm hoping that is the case with our boys too!

I believe I have found a treasure in my Batman.  In these days where many men rarely stick around, much less tough it out, where they stop talking and start walking, I have found a man who doesn't put up with silliness, stands up for what he believes, says, "I love you" to his boys, hugs and kisses them anytime, willingly reads the same good-night book over and over until it's memorized, makes wonderful dinners, cleans the kitchen, changes diapers (now of other people's babies), mows the lawn, fixes cars (including those that aren't ours), helps me pick out a pair of jeans that look good on me, washes and folds laundry, whispers sweet nothings in my ear, tells me how sexy I am, waters the garden, picks up dog poop and this is just on one of his days off! I guess I just want to say how absolutely satisfying it is to have someone to lean on, stand next to, and to be the father our kids need.

I love you babe!