I don't know how many times in my life I have dealt with "adult boys", Ok, men ( I say "adult boy" because I don't believe boys ever grow up - that's why we love them so much) where one man is talking about something and how great it is and the other man starts talking about how his is so much better. I believe we could all recall a conversation or two. I never was sure where to stand when those conversations came up or I've chalked it up to girls being around and so they want to show how great they are, or how much better they are. Forget that whole line of thought. I'm sorry girls but we don't even come into the equation when they start talking like that (ok, maybe on a few occasions). I'm convinced boys think like that from birth and talk like that from the day they can form sentences. I don't know how many times I have heard just this past weekend the "Mine is Bigger" scenario. Here's a few examples:
"Hulk, look at my french fry! It's so huge!....Hulk: "Mine is bigger"
"Captain America, look at the bubble I made!....CA: "Mine is bigger"
"Captain America, look at the skid mark my tire made!....CA: "Look, I made mine longer" (ok, it varies a little but still the same concept)
"Hulk, look how big my name is on the driveway (with chalk - I know some of you were wondering)....Hulk: "Mine is bigger"
It is amazing to me what lengths these boys will go to make whatever they are doing bigger than their brother's or friend's. I have seen them jump off of places that made me close my eyes, create stacks of toys that defy the laws of gravity, balance on tightropes that would make circus performers proud, and pretty much throw all caution to the wind. Not like there is a huge amount of risk management going on in those fabulous brains anyway. This "Mine is bigger" can be very exhausting to deal with because it seems to be where "I Triple Dog Dare You" came from. Being the biggest is only confirmed once the other boy has had a chance to test the theory. The good thing is that eventually someone is or has "the biggest" and they move on to something else.
You may be wondering why I chose to share this bit of information. I think for me it was an epiphany to the whole "boy" thing. They are just like that. Trying to change them is like stripping away a part of them. I just have to let them figure out who's the biggest at what and then they figure out what they are good at. Of course that means settling a lot of arguments, and redirecting interesting behavior, but if that helps them become good men (adult boys) then I'll do my best. Plus right now - I'm the Biggest!!
P.S. I think that's why the boys like the books "I'm the Biggest Thing in the Ocean" and "Shark Vs. Train" - check them out, they are really cute books. Just like the boys that love to read them!
